Embracing Our Unique Minds: Thriving with ADHD by Working with, Not Against, Our Brains.

 I had an initial ADHD life coaching session with a friend yesterday.  I'll call him A.  Something he kept saying really resonated with me.  My interpretation of what he said was, that even things that he is now very good at, such as drawing, were tough for him to learn.  He also thinks that he 'should' be able to do things the same way a neurotypical person does them.  

Thinking about this this morning made me think of my intense struggles getting through the final year of my degree. On one occasion, even the thought of sitting in my study made me cry, and I had to ask for advice from my support worker as to what to do-she advised a walk whilst listening to music on my headphones.  This helped, but it was still a few days until I was able to sit in my study.  

I compare this struggle, where the only thing that got me through the last few months of my degree was the thought of me in my gown at my graduation ceremony, to my experience with my ADHD life coaching training, which overlapped my completing my degree by about three weeks.  I'm loving my training, although it took me a while to realise how much happier I've been feeling recently!  I guess my question to myself and my readers is, 'Is it the way of learning that makes the difference, or that we're learning the right thing for us?  Or is it possibly a combination of the two?'  

A is very clear that his learning style is visual.  He explained being told things and then having to work it out in his head for it to make sense to him.  I likened this to him having to translate everything into a second language.  That means potentially twice the work for anyone who isn't an audible learner.  So, am I fortunate that my training is presented in many different ways so that it is accessible to anybody, regardless of their learning style?  I definitely am lucky.  However, if I were learning law or accountancy using this method, I think I would still find it very challenging.  So, personally, I think it's a combination of both learning the right subject for ourselves and being provided with the opportunity to learn in a way that suits us best.  Anyone who is interested in finding out their learning style can check VARK: https://vark-learn.com/. 

A's desire to be able to function as a neurotypical person also struck a chord with me.  This was what I wanted to be able to do too!  I think possibly the most useful thing my own ADHD coach said to me was that it wasn't possible for me to do things in the same way as a neurotypical person and that it was more beneficial to learn to work with how my brain works.  For me, this often means leaping from one task to another in a seemingly illogical way.  However, following a more logical step-by-step approach doesn't work for me, and I know that now!  One real positive of this is that once we stop fighting our ADHD brain, it gets easier.  I think the main problem for me was trying to do things in a way that didn't suit me, trying to do things in a way that other people wanted me to do them.  Maybe I am lucky that I'm training from home; I will be seeing clients from home, too, and I can fit tasks around my energy and emotional levels.  However, it would clearly be beneficial if everyone had the opportunity to learn in a way that suits them.  I would love to hear your thoughts on this please!