ADHD connections: ADHD coach in training!

Introduction Do you ever put off starting something because you’re afraid you won’t do it well enough ?  Maybe you wait for the "perfect" moment, but that moment never comes—so the task stays unfinished.  This is the perfectionism-procrastination cycle , and it’s incredibly common for people with ADHD. ADHD brains are wired for all-or-nothing thinking . If we can’t do something perfectly , we often avoid it altogether.  But the longer we put it off, the more overwhelming it feels—leading to more procrastination, more anxiety, and a growing fear of failure. The good news?   You can break this cycle.   Let’s explore why ADHD makes us afraid to fail and how to move forward without waiting for perfection. Why ADHD Fuels Fear of Failure 1. Rejection Sensitivity (RSD) and Fear of Criticism Many ADHDers experience Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) —an intense emotional response to perceived failure or criticism.  Even small mistakes can feel devasta...

Introduction Do you ever find yourself stuck in decision paralysis , spending way too much time weighing up every possible option?  Whether it’s choosing what to eat for dinner or making a big life decision, ADHD can turn even simple choices into overwhelming mental spirals. ADHD brains struggle with executive function , which affects prioritisation, impulse control, and working memory—all crucial for decision-making.  The result?  You overthink, avoid, or delay decisions until you’re forced to make a rushed choice under pressure. The good news?   You can make decisions easier and faster by using ADHD-friendly strategies.   Let’s break it down. Why ADHD Makes Decision-Making Hard 1. Too Many Options = Brain Overload ADHD brains struggle with filtering information .  When faced with multiple choices, you might get stuck analysing every detail, making it impossible to choose. 2. Fear of "Getting It Wrong" If you’ve made impulsive or "bad" decisi...

Introduction Rest is essential.  But if you have ADHD, you might struggle to allow yourself to rest without guilt.   You finally take a break, but instead of enjoying it, your brain starts whispering: ❌ "You should be doing something productive." ❌ "You’re wasting time!" ❌ "You’ll never get anything done if you keep stopping!" So instead of feeling rested, you feel restless.  You might even push yourself to keep working—until you hit burnout. If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone.  ADHD brains often struggle with work-rest balance , but learning how to rest without guilt is key to long-term productivity and well-being. Why ADHD Makes Rest Feel Uncomfortable 1. "I Have So Much to Do—How Can I Just Stop?" ADHD makes it hard to prioritise tasks and manage time.  This can create a constant feeling of being behind , making rest feel like something you "haven’t earned yet." 2. Hyperfocus and Overworking When ADHDers get into...

Introduction When you have ADHD, overwhelm is a frequent companion.   Maybe your to-do list is a mile long, your home feels cluttered, or you have multiple deadlines looming.  Instead of knowing where to start, you feel frozen—stuck in a cycle of avoidance and guilt. Sound familiar?  You’re not alone.  ADHD brains struggle with executive function , making it hard to prioritise, break things down, and start tasks.  The good news? There are ways to bypass that overwhelmed, paralysed feeling and take action—even when it feels impossible. Why Does ADHD Cause Overwhelm? 1. Task Paralysis ADHD brains struggle with initiation , meaning we might want to get things done but can’t seem to start.  The bigger or more unclear the task, the harder it is to begin. 2. Everything Feels Equally Important When faced with multiple tasks, our brains struggle to prioritise .  Should you reply to emails, clean the kitchen, or finish that work project?  Instead o...

Introduction If you’ve ever tried to follow mainstream productivity advice—things like "just use a planner," "set SMART goals," or "stick to a routine"—you may have wondered: Why does this work for everyone else, but not me? The truth is, that  most productivity strategies are designed for neurotypical brains. They assume that: ✔ You can easily start and stop tasks when you want. ✔ Deadlines and consequences are enough motivation. ✔ Structure and self-discipline come naturally. For people with ADHD, that’s not how our brains work.  We struggle with executive function, time management, and interest-based motivation , which means traditional methods often fall flat.  But that doesn’t mean we can’t be productive—it just means we need different strategies that work with our brains, not against them. Why Traditional Productivity Advice Fails for ADHD 1. "Just Make a To-Do List" The problem: To-do lists can become overwhelming, especially ...

Introduction Getting diagnosed with ADHD as an adult can be a life-changing moment.  For some, it’s a relief—finally, an explanation for years of struggles.  But for many, it also brings a wave of grief . You might find yourself thinking: ❌ "How different would my life be if I had known sooner?" ❌ "Why did no one notice?" ❌ "I’ve spent years struggling when I didn’t have to." It’s completely normal to grieve the time, opportunities, and self-esteem lost before your diagnosis.  But while the past can’t be changed, you can choose how you move forward—with self-compassion, understanding, and a new sense of possibility. Why Late Diagnosis Can Bring Grief 1. Feeling Like You "Missed Out" on an Easier Life You might wonder how things could have been different if you had been diagnosed earlier— in school, at work, in relationships.   Maybe you struggled with self-doubt, were labelled lazy, or had to work twice as hard as everyone else.  The...